Mission #1.

I have hereby decided to embrace Jacksonville.

Art is about sharing your unique experience with others and gosh darnit I'm going to do it.

Even if Jacksonville is so mundane it makes me want to claw out my eyes once a week.

I'm going to give it a GREAT big hug.
Kiss it on the cheek and say bittersweet nothings into it's ears.

I'm on a mission to expose it's individuality.

Come on Jacksonville. Strut. Your. Stuff.

The only real Truth.

At work, it's easy to get excited when something abnormal happens.

Unfortunately when you work in the medical field that means that something is bad.

I can't help it when my heart flutters at the sound of a motor-neuron disease.

I can't hide a smile when a patient says they're moving their fingers when they clearly are not.

I'm seeking truth all day long. Is it there?
Sometimes I need a test to see it.
Sometimes I just know.
But either way, I like having the numbers and the pictures to prove it.

Sigh.

If only there was a science for people. For relationships and predicting the future and everything else in life that isn't physical. A truth test.

So when something "abnormal" happens.
When my stomach sinks, or my heart races - I'll know.
Because there would be proof somewhere that I'm allowed to feel that way.
That I'm allowed to fully live that moment to the fullest.
A Bachelor in Psychology won't get you that. I bet a doctorate won't either.
You just have to trust yourself

Anger + Love = Passion

Thank you Tony's for exposing me to beautiful theater before I ever saw a Broadway play.

Big Movie Zone -- Toy Story 3: An IMAX 3D Experience

Big Movie Zone -- Toy Story 3: An IMAX 3D Experience

Bye Bye Birdie had it right.

This made us laugh so hard.

Thanks Maggie for the site.

Thoughts after a bikini wax.

I want to be good with my hands.

Right now my hand-eye coordination is basically non-existent.

I need better balance.


And as I'm thinking about all these things I'm doing wrong. I just take a deep breath and think.

I can change.

I can change my mind.

I can change the way I do something and make it better.

I used to think (and still do quite often) that if I can't do something right then I should just move on. But I'm not going to do that right now. Right now I'm going to stick it out. I'm going to risk feeling pain, making mistakes and looking stupid. I'm going to push myself.

As cliche as this sounds: I need to take the good with the bad.

I need some adventure.

Thank God bikini waxes only last 15 minutes.

P.P. S. My personal trainer kicked my ass again.

I've been living my life in black and white.

The major fault of science. I want more art.

Bring in the gray. Nay - Bring in the color.

P.S. My personal trainer kicked my ass tonight.

Caveat to my previous post: Energy for others does not include energy for listening to others.

That, I do not have. It has been made increasingly clear that I'm rarely fully engaged in a conversation. Even when it's about me.

Get to the point. What do I need to know? Words have never been my strong suit.

Strangely enough, I've been considered a "good listener" my whole life. It's probably more for the reason that I just don't have that much to say.

I'm bad at sharing.

Maybe I never learned how to have fun.

The first weekend in a long time I'm relaxed.

Last week was a marathon of work. When I wasn't at work I was sleeping.

I don't know what happened over the last few days (maybe the sleep I got) but I feel alive. I feel like I have the energy for other people. A break from work does wonders.

I'm ready to start creating again.

No, I don't work here.

More wine, please.


Okay, now you can ask me about my day.

Despite my anxiously driven motivation to keep busy and my demand for immediate gratification, I'm actually taking charge of my life.

Getting my body in shape, my fingers on the keys, and my head way way up in the clouds.

No one gets Jingle bells with two hands right on the first try.